Okay friend, this message today is just for you if you feel like you're struggling with the whole work and life balance thing. These tips that I'm going to share with you, you can start to implement today!
I know how hard it is to find balance in your life when you work, manage a home, have relationships with other people and then try to have a social life too. Then add in all the other things that need done or that you want to do and well, you’ve got very little or no time left for you.
I truly get it!
Being a mom of two and fur-momma to five as of this post, I’ve traveled that road and I’ve done the best that I could do to find somewhat of a balance that has worked for me and I want to share that with other busy folks who are looking for the same.
Here’s a few tips that I think will help you once you add them into your daily routine.
Take care of you!
We get so busy taking care of everyone that often we forget one special person. That’s ourselves! Theres only so many hours in a day to try and get everything done and it can be overwhelming.
It’s then that we end up tired, stressed and frustrated because we’re not where we want to be with our own goals that we more or less just pick and choose whatever is most important for that day so that we can get things done and crossed off our to do list which leaves us feeling un-fulfilled.
The truth though is simply this. You need to take care of yourself too!
You are just as deserving as anyone else to have a GOOD life and while it might seem like it's better to do for yourself after everything else is done for the day, the old saying, “you can’t pour from an empty cup” tends to hold true.
If you’re tired, frustrated or any other kind of feel, (which is totally okay by the way!) think about the many ways that you can take some time for you. This self care journal is a great tool to help you do that.
What needs changed?
For me, things started to change when I started putting systems in place that allowed me to start stepping away from the day-to-day things (and people) too, that did not make my heart happy.
I began to delegate tasks, set boundaries with toxic people and I took action, even if it was a baby step verses trying to have everything perfect before I started on a task or project.
You see, one thing I learned too on this journey was that while getting things done can be a good thing, trying to wait for "perfect" times, people, etc. often leads to procrastination which isn’t a good thing and because I wasn't taking action, I wasn’t progressing in my life like I hoped.
Don’t be shy!!
As a caretaker, it's natural to want to do it all because we don’t want to miss out on all of the things going on. I knew that I wanted to be at every ball game, at every school event and all of the other things my kids were involved with but it wasn’t always possible.
I sat down one day and talked with my supervisor. It wasn’t long after that were able to make arrangements for me to take time out of the day for my kids activities. When there were times when I couldn’t be there for whatever reason, I’d ask a family member or friend to step in and record or take notes for me.
I also am a do it "yourselfer." I know that's really not a word but it sounds better than "control freak." I know what I like and how I like it done. It’s often easier for me just to do it myself because I want it a certain way or I want to control everything about it, but there’s no balance in that. You have to learn to trust others. (That's a whole different lesson for a different day.)
What can you delegate to your significant other or even the kids? Would it save you time, even money if you hired someone to do something for you?
Chores aren’t a bad thing for kids when they are age appropriate and they actually like helping out which can lead to them being responsible adults. Trust me that one day, you’ll walk in and your kids have done the dishes without you asking and you will be so proud that they are helping out and thought enough about what needed done around the house and did it.
Or, because you like to have your hands in everything, that you've spent so many hours to fix something that you've lost that time, the memories you could have made, etc. when you could have easily hired it out.
Please know this if you’re like me…..the do it "yourselfer" that asking for help doesn’t mean we are weak. It actually makes us stronger.
Also, trying to do everything all the time is just plain exhausting!
Draw a line.
Want in on a secret about me? I like to work. Yes, I said it! and I’ll say it again. I LIKE TO WORK! but I know that there must be a line thats drawn so that I have work time and then family time.
There was a time where my work and home life intertwined in the sense that I was never off. That included holidays, vacations, summer breaks or any other day, you’d catch me working. That didn’t go so well and there were so many times I look back and wished I had made this change earlier because I missed out on things.
By creating a calendar for work stuff and home stuff by planning ahead, I’m able to balance my life better even now. I do something called “time blocking.” This is where I have specific activities scheduled in my calendar at specific times. I have my self care, my work time, dinner time, fitness time (and no, I don’t count that as self care because we need to do that for our physical health), time with my girls, date nights, etc. I’ve been doing this for a few years now and it’s really helped us.
Finding a balance between work and life is possible. You’ll have to make some changes but it can be done. I’d love to hear what’s working for you in finding more balance in your life. Do share!
In this together!